:( I am 27 with 2 boys. Keanon is 6 and Hunter is 4. Keanon is so angry. He tells me all the time that he hates me. Maybe he does... maybe he doesn't. But I don't blame him for hatting me. I left my boys with my mom and she gave them to their dad. I left for almost a year. I moved out of state and got addicted to drugs. I came home. I tried to get clean and straight. But I left 3 weeks later.. out of state. I came home in about another 3 weeks.
I was clean for awhile. Then got on the drugs again. I am clean now. And I am really trying to show my boys that they are the world to me. But Keanon doesn't want to give me a chance. I just don't know what to do... or how to do it! Could someone please, help me!
Full Version: My Babys
Hi, Sheryl.
Kids go through an awful time with alcoholic and addict parents. They lose trust over a long period of time usually. It will take a while, but I'm sure they love you. They're just afraid. Afraid of accepting you and then losing you again. The best thing you can do for them is to stay clean and sober. Let your actions speak for you. They will see the new you, and they will trust again.
Kids go through an awful time with alcoholic and addict parents. They lose trust over a long period of time usually. It will take a while, but I'm sure they love you. They're just afraid. Afraid of accepting you and then losing you again. The best thing you can do for them is to stay clean and sober. Let your actions speak for you. They will see the new you, and they will trust again.
Hi Sheryl,
You are blessed to be so young and waking up. I got sober at 25.
I have observed my kids friends when I have been pregnant. They know me as so and so's mother, but the bigger I got during pregnancies, the less they recognized me and hence they withdrew. they were confused. They didn't see "me" anymore, but a stranger.
Even now, and my oldest is the same age as your oldest, and is sharp as a tack (reads and writes, adds none of it my doing) when she runs into someone she hasn't seen in a long time, she gets confused.
So they say they hate you. I have never drank or used or been away from my kids,
my 3 year old tells me she hates me a million times a day
Don't even ask what else she says!!!
please remember sheryl, feelings aren't facts. use this as a wake up call earn their trust again somehow. they are young enough to bounce back and innocent enough to forgive
Now if you want them to forgive you, LEARN TO FORGIVE YOURSELF FIRST. on airplanes they say the parent must put the oxygen mask on before their child's .
I hated my mother as a kid, I really did. She knows it and takes full responsibility for everything today and is a wonderful grandmother. I was a kid in the 70's when it was very chic to go home with whomever you wanted to. Not my cup of tea, but for a while it was my mothers. I remember being 7 or 8 and writing her a lettier tell her I thought she was a prostitue and signed it "hate" instead of "love". and I meant every singel word of it. I had no idea what the heck she was doing and it confused and pissed me off.
I lived with my mother and she chose men over us time and time again, even marrying someone who refused to live with us, and on weekends we were basically on our own.
UNLIKE YOU, SHE DID NOT WAKE UP IN TIME TO GET THE MESSAGE. SHE IS NOT AN ALKIE, BUT SHE CHOSE OTHER THINGS OVER US, AND SHE CAN NEVER GET THAT BACK. THIS WILL HURT HER TILL THE DAY SHE DIES, AND SHE IS A GOOD WOMAN. HER DRUG OF CHOICE HAPPEN TO BE MEN WHEN I WAS A KID. What can ya do?
Today she has changed. I trust her today and that took over 30 years to do, even though i desperately wanted to trust her as a kid and a teen, i knew i really couldn't fully trust her. Maybe I can today, maybe I can't, but I don't care anymore.
See we do get to that point, over time where we don't have to know everything and neither do others. We can just be. Just live and let live, but it takes a ton of work and patience.
I still fall down all the time, it is the amount of time it takes to bounce back and move on that has changed in me. It can change in you too, if you give yourself some time.
God Bless
You are blessed to be so young and waking up. I got sober at 25.
I have observed my kids friends when I have been pregnant. They know me as so and so's mother, but the bigger I got during pregnancies, the less they recognized me and hence they withdrew. they were confused. They didn't see "me" anymore, but a stranger.
Even now, and my oldest is the same age as your oldest, and is sharp as a tack (reads and writes, adds none of it my doing) when she runs into someone she hasn't seen in a long time, she gets confused.
So they say they hate you. I have never drank or used or been away from my kids,
my 3 year old tells me she hates me a million times a day
Don't even ask what else she says!!!please remember sheryl, feelings aren't facts. use this as a wake up call earn their trust again somehow. they are young enough to bounce back and innocent enough to forgive
Now if you want them to forgive you, LEARN TO FORGIVE YOURSELF FIRST. on airplanes they say the parent must put the oxygen mask on before their child's .
I hated my mother as a kid, I really did. She knows it and takes full responsibility for everything today and is a wonderful grandmother. I was a kid in the 70's when it was very chic to go home with whomever you wanted to. Not my cup of tea, but for a while it was my mothers. I remember being 7 or 8 and writing her a lettier tell her I thought she was a prostitue and signed it "hate" instead of "love". and I meant every singel word of it. I had no idea what the heck she was doing and it confused and pissed me off.
I lived with my mother and she chose men over us time and time again, even marrying someone who refused to live with us, and on weekends we were basically on our own.
UNLIKE YOU, SHE DID NOT WAKE UP IN TIME TO GET THE MESSAGE. SHE IS NOT AN ALKIE, BUT SHE CHOSE OTHER THINGS OVER US, AND SHE CAN NEVER GET THAT BACK. THIS WILL HURT HER TILL THE DAY SHE DIES, AND SHE IS A GOOD WOMAN. HER DRUG OF CHOICE HAPPEN TO BE MEN WHEN I WAS A KID. What can ya do?
Today she has changed. I trust her today and that took over 30 years to do, even though i desperately wanted to trust her as a kid and a teen, i knew i really couldn't fully trust her. Maybe I can today, maybe I can't, but I don't care anymore.
See we do get to that point, over time where we don't have to know everything and neither do others. We can just be. Just live and let live, but it takes a ton of work and patience.
I still fall down all the time, it is the amount of time it takes to bounce back and move on that has changed in me. It can change in you too, if you give yourself some time.
God Bless
Hang in there, No matter what don't pick up the first one, God is not through with us yet. Time heals all wounds for us today. I am new here and trying to learn how to use this forum. Please forgive me it this is confusing. My e-mail address is tg1201991recivery@peoplepc.com Talk with you later, Faith4T
QUOTE(Sheryl @ Mar 18 2005, 10:43 AM)
I am 27 with 2 boys. Keanon is 6 and Hunter is 4. Keanon is so angry. He tells me all the time that he hates me. Maybe he does... maybe he doesn't. But I don't blame him for hatting me. I left my boys with my mom and she gave them to their dad. I left for almost a year. I moved out of state and got addicted to drugs. I came home. I tried to get clean and straight. But I left 3 weeks later.. out of state. I came home in about another 3 weeks. I was clean for awhile. Then got on the drugs again. I am clean now. And I am really trying to show my boys that they are the world to me. But Keanon doesn't want to give me a chance. I just don't know what to do... or how to do it! Could someone please, help me!
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QUOTE(Faith4T @ Mar 20 2005, 02:33 AM)
:) Hang in there, No matter what don't pick up the first one, God is not through with us yet. Time heals all wounds for us today. I am new here and trying to learn how to use this forum. Please forgive me it this is confusing.
My e-mail address is tg1201991recivery@peoplepc.com Talk with you later, Faith4T
My e-mail address is tg1201991recivery@peoplepc.com Talk with you later, Faith4T
QUOTE(Sheryl @ Mar 18 2005, 10:43 AM)
:( I am 27 with 2 boys. Keanon is 6 and Hunter is 4. Keanon is so angry. He tells me all the time that he hates me. Maybe he does... maybe he doesn't. But I don't blame him for hatting me. I left my boys with my mom and she gave them to their dad. I left for almost a year. I moved out of state and got addicted to drugs. I came home. I tried to get clean and straight. But I left 3 weeks later.. out of state. I came home in about another 3 weeks.
I was clean for awhile. Then got on the drugs again. I am clean now. And I am really trying to show my boys that they are the world to me. But Keanon doesn't want to give me a chance. I just don't know what to do... or how to do it! Could someone please, help me!
I was clean for awhile. Then got on the drugs again. I am clean now. And I am really trying to show my boys that they are the world to me. But Keanon doesn't want to give me a chance. I just don't know what to do... or how to do it! Could someone please, help me!
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Thankyou for the good advise. It is really helpful! I have saved some of what you both said.. so that i can read it later when I get frusterated! :)
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