hi guys,

hope you are all well.

how have you all been doing?

yesterdy i learned that my A bro is homeless again.

and i feel kinda sad.
i want to help him, but i know that for my own sanity that i cant!

this situation is of his own making and he has to take responsiblity.

its just so hard knowing that hes homeless again.

and me feeling sad about this is a sign to me to watch that i dont slide into the fixing mode again, cause it would be all to easy to slide back into looking after him,
but i know now that, that wouldnt be helping him, it would just be enabling him to stay dependant on me to fix his problems, and HE NEEDS to learn to fix them for himself.

all i can do is pray for him and hope that my hp looks after him.

love in recovery.
irish

Sorry to hear about your brother, Irish. So many of us are "helpers" and it is indeed tough to stand back and pray that people will become responsible for themselves. I'll put him in my prayers too, and you as well. Hang in there.

Hi Irish,

I tryed to fix and help and... till I could nor even take care of myself anymore and had to start a program of recovery to just be still breathing

One of my aunts died earlier than anyone could expect exausting herself trying to keep my ancle out of streets.

Lately, I have been able to see of times I stressed myself to do what I then thought was help and now I know did not help, raised dependency and brought to my shoulders a weight I could not carry.

I am proud of you. It is very difficult to keep serenity on this circunstances and you are doing.

((((((((((())))))))))

hi guys.
dont know how or why i didnt reply to these posts.

but i've been rereading some of the post and i just wanted to say thank you for the support.
my bro is homeless again after getting a flat and losing it....but they are his choices.

today i try my level best to mind my own affairs and not interfere with choices and desicions that other ppl have made for themselves, weather their chioces/desicions are good or bad for them...cause its not for me to decide whats best for someone else.

ACoa recovery has taught me that i can only change myself...which was a big shock to me.....giving that i thought i could control the world

i still see my bro, still love him, but dont take on the responsiblity of him any more.

thanks again for the support.

love in recovery.
irish