I am sitting here with tears in my eyes and i cant stop. I have been married to a great man for 6 months, and have noticed in the last 2 months the drinking has become worse. Every other weekend i work 12 hours 7am to 7pm, I have come home after working these hours to a house that i have to clean because there is broken beer bottles on the floor, because there is a mess in the kitchen from him trying to cook. The last straw was about a month ago when i came home and he was knealt down in front of the toilet. I told him the next day that I wouldn't say anything about his drinking until it became a problem with us and let him know it was becoming a problem with us. He told me he would take care of it, but i am not seeing much improvement. I feel that i am doing something wrong. I am a nurse and I am suppose to be able to help fix things and I cant at all. I love him and wont leave him. I know he works hard during the week and during the week he hardly drinks at all, but the weekend.... are getting out of hand.
He has a teenage son, he lost custody of his son when the boy was 5 yrs old due to drinking. He worked really hard to get him back, doing everything he was suppose to do. He went to AA meetings. About 4 yrs ago got his son back, he drank behind his back for 2 years (so he thought, the son knew he was drinking) and last summer everything was brought out in the open and now drinks in front of the son. The boy hates his dad drinking, but he wont say anything because he loves his dad so much and his afraid that he will have to go back and live with his mother.
I just dont know what to do or where to turn, I thought maybe if I came here I could get some support. I have prayed and prayed, and I know God does not give us more than we can bear, but I dont feel I am getting any help from him.
Sorry this is so long.
Renee

Hi, Renee. Welcome to the forums.

I'd also suggest some face-to-face Al-Anon meetings if there are any where you live.

The bad news is that there's not much you can do for him unless he wants help, and if he's an alcoholic that will mean giving up drinking -- totally.

The good news is that Al-Anon has helped many, many people help themselves when it comes to living or interacting with alcoholics.

The primary Al-Anon web site is here: http://www.al-anon.org. There you can search for a meeting near you.

There is also an online outreach web site with additional Al-Anon chat and email meetings here: http://www.ola-is.org.

Hi Renee,

All I can offer is a shoulder to cry on (figuratively speaking) and some hugs.

I know what it is like to grow up in an alcoholic household and I would suggest that you help his son find an ala-teen meeting or a councellor because trust me even if he isn't saying anything he is hurting.

I have not yet gone to a face to face meeting (I'm a big chicken) but even coming here and venting about the A in my life is sometimes enough.