[B][FONT=Arial][SIZE=1][COLOR=purple] It finally happened, my addicted husband left. This is harder than I thought, not the being alone with the house, the kids, and all the responsibilities, i'm used to that, he was always drinking, I always took care of everything, but the hurt inside of not having the person I love with me anymore. He went to a friends house to get sober, clean up his act and try to learn to love himself again, I hope for his sake it works. I have four kids, ages 17, 14 and 8 yr old twin boys who are having a very hard time. Zachary, one of the twins, cries alot, is very emotional, he is also angry, and acting out, and my older kids are just angry. They dont understand why he couldnt go to meetings, work with a councelor, and do this with the help and support of his family. He felt it was easier for him to just leave, and I honestly dont fully understand it myself. We have always been supportive of him, alays been there for him, especially all the times he came home smashed, or spent his entire paycheck on Friday night on a crack binge, we tried to encourage him to go to meetings, or rehab, told him we would be there for him, but all we got was i'm sorry, his famous words. Then he just decides to up and leave, everything is about what is better and easier for him, he never worries about the rest of us, it hurts. I have been told not to be sad, to get mad, then if and when he cleans himself up and if he still wants to come home, we can be tough with him so he wont use again, and I am trying, but this is the hardest thing I have ever had to do. Does anyone have any other advice to help me through this? I will listen and try, I can really use a friend right now, especially someone who has been there, dont that. My heart is breaking, and I feel more alone than I have ever felt before. Thanks, Kellie

hi Mom,

I had been there not as a wife, but as a child.

As a wife, I was luck to meet my husband when he was already sober doing the AA program.

I can feel your pain and how hard it is for you and the kids. So I wished to send you some words of love.

Must them all, love yourself now.

He will sober up in his own time, it is not in your power to do anything about his addiction. Understand his action of leave is probably also an action of love. He thought that was the right thing to do. He is in a Higher Power care. We all have a Higher Power that do for us what we can not do for ourselves.

Mom, even if you do believe anythng, pray. Prayers helps and give us the faith that things will be alright.

And you don´t have to do it alone. Go to an Alanon meeting close to your area. Stay connect with other womem going throught the same or that had been there. There is also Alateen to your teenager kids. Working the Alanon 12 steps you can make it better for yourself and your kids.

Big hugs,
Lucia

I mean more than all.... not must them all... and I forgot to sign in and cant edit my previous post, so i will post again with corrections:

hi Mom,

I have been there not as a wife, but as a child.

As a wife, I was luck to meet my husband when he was already sober doing the AA program.

I can feel your pain and how hard it is for you and the kids. So I wish to send you some words of love.

More than all, love yourself now.

He will sober up in his own time, it is not in your power to do anything about his addiction. Understand his action of leave is probably also an action of love. He thought that was the right thing to do. He is in a Higher Power care. We all have a Higher Power that do for us what we can not do for ourselves.

Mom, even if you do not believe in anythng, pray. Prayers helps and give us the faith that things will be alright.

And you don´t have to do it alone. Go to an Alanon meeting close to your area. Stay connect with other womem going throught the same or that had been there. There is also Alateen to your teenager kids. Working the Alanon 12 steps you can make it better for yourself and your kids.

Big hugs,
Lucia